Jargon - Fortune Cookies We'd Like to See

Fortune Cookies We'd Like to See


YOU MAKE GOD SICK.
YOUR FAVORITE CHARITY PISSES YOUR MONEY AWAY AT THE LOCAL PUB.
YOU ARE BITTER, DECEPTIVE, AND PETTY.
YOU ARE A MAN AMONG GODS.
LOVE IS IN YOUR PAST BUT NOT IN YOUR FUTURE.
YOU'RE UGLY, YOUR MOTHER DRESSES YOU FUNNY, AND YOUR BUTT SMELLS.
YOU WILL NEVER GET THE RECOGNITION YOU DESERVE.
YOU ARE TRULY AS VALUABLE AS THE CHEMICALS YOU ARE MADE OF.
YOU ARE A MOIST, STEAMING HAIRBALL ON THE DUNG HEAP OF LIFE.
YOU DON'T MASTURBATE ENOUGH.
YOU WILL DIE ALONE AND PENNILESS.
YOUR DESCENDANTS WILL DENY THAT YOU EVER EXISTED.
YOU WILL DIE GASPING FOR AIR ON A URINE-SOAKED MATTRESS.
YOUR LOVER IS CHEATING ON YOU RIGHT NOW.
DO NOT DRINK JACK DANIELS AFTER MIDNIGHT.
YOUR CODE IS A CESSPOOL OF POISON, YOUR ALGORITHMS A MALODOROUS DEARTH OF INGENUITY.
YOU HAVE A SMALL, PLASTIC HEART.
OBEY THIS FORTUNE COOKIE.
UNEASY LIES THE HEAD THAT HAS DANDRUFF.
YOU ARE ONLY AS DUMB AS OTHERS THINK YOU ARE SMART.
WHY DO YOU EVEN TRY?
PASS THE WORD, EAT A BIBLE. Error reading .private/jargonnav.inc
Copyright 2009, Dave Polaschek. Last updated on Mon, 15 Feb 2010 14:06:30.