Jargon - B

B


bad programmer interj. Said when scolding a software engine for introducing a bug or for coding something foolishly. Phrase derived from bad dog!

barbism n. Any snippet of code written in a grossly inefficient, inelegant or otherwise ignoble manner. An example is:

	char s[128];
	memset(s,0,128);
	strcat(s,"foo");

See JeffN's cube for an entire wall of classics. Also see bobcat, a perfect example.

Bart day n. The day of the week that The Simpsons is broadcast, Formerly Thursday. Many use the BART.COM program in their AUTOEXEC.BAT files to help with a countdown to Bart, and some even modified the DATE.COM file to say "Bart Day" instead of "Thursday." See Bart night.

Bart night n. An evening in which The Simpsons is broadcast on network television, Formerly Thursday night. Implied drinking involved, see Aaron party. Bart starts at 7:00 p.m.

baseline bounce n. Any perceptable jumping of certain characters which should be sitting at or below the baseline. Noticable only at small point sizes and only with other manufacturer's engines.

batch mode n. Eating, drinking and presenting things as a group. See gang programming.

bay of death n. The area behind the 7182 door. Former home of DTC, the software library, and the embedded software group consisting of Jeff Pagel, Chris Schuman, Bernie DeMaster, John Clark and Susan Pearson, all dead. Later home to Tino Martinez. Also dead.

Bayoff interj. Negative answer to boolean Bayon query.

Bayon n. 1. Former name of highly revered former Cambodian restaurant in Hopkins (new name Kim Fug). Home of curry chicken, power steak and cheesy foofoos. Now defunct. No forwarding address. No further information is available. 2. Food from the Bayon. interj. Bellowed at lunchtime to announce a prescheduled or impromptu group trip. interr. Boolean query of lunch or dinner plans to which an expedient answer is required. v. To patronize the Bayon.

Bayon day n. Any day of the week reserved for Bayon. Traditionally Mondays, virtual Mondays and Thursdays for PC folk, Wednesdays for Mac folk, who always snag the big table to the consternation of those who show up later.

Bayonosphere n. See Bayon. The level of the atmosphere most conducive to the vaporization of the small red peppers sometimes mischeivously spiked into the curry chicken by the cruel and evil husband/cook of Kim Fug. Participants are said to "launch into the Bayonosphere."

Bayon tender n. Someone else's check made out to the Bayon, grabbed from the center of the table in place of monetary change when exact change is not available. The check is then used at a later date in place of cash or your own check.

beautiful n. Endearing term, but somewhat of a joke; part of a morning greeting, but usually not spoken with emphasis or jocularity. Hey, beautiful.

bigger than your head Tabloid size or bigger. From the original behemoth LM 1200, tee-shirt for LX 3.50 release Print pages bigger than your head.

big N n. 1. The next release. 2. Said of a feature or bug fix when there is insufficient time to correct for the current release. See known bug and desired feature.

big spit n. Liquid vomit, usually a result of drinking. From Hunter S. Thompson's Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. See broken, Aaron party, release party, LM Drink, J.D. Co, Reverend Jack. So...I hear you did the big spit!

Bimbo's n. A bar in Smyrna, Georgia whose back room was overtaken by a few dozen loud LM'ers during Spring `91 Demcox. The evening included a North Stars playoff game, obscene amounts of food, 22 pitchers of LM Drink, shots of tequilla for everyone present, Jane and Scott. The owner migrated from and also owns another Bimbo's in Hibbing, Minnesota.

bit n. A particular Boolean status or property of an object. His car doesn't have the smoking bit set. My hamburger has the cheese bit set.

black lab n. Preferred habitat of software engineers; no light or as little light as possible.

blanket time interj. 1. Cover the drunk; announced when someone is rolling around on the floor, babbling incoherently and/or incessantly; the intent is to remove the unsightly offender from view (see also B.Y.O.B.). 2. Cover the couple; announced when two people are rolling around on the floor, babbling incoherently and/or incessantly; the intent is to remove the unsightly offenders from view.

Blood Brother, Initiate n. Anyone who has made proper blood sacrifice to Mac the Knife by blooding themselves and the floor in QA while opening or closing the case.

Blood Sacrifice, Virgin n. Anyone attempting to open or close the case of Mac the Knife for the first time. interj. Shouted with glee by QA Mac guys when a virgin approaches Mac the Knife, intoning the sacred chant, "So...what's so hard?"

blow away Transfer v. To delete all files and subdirectories in Transfer, as in "rm -r"; periodic maintenance maneuver to conserve file server disk space. If the person blowing away Transfer is not being a gunkie or a foofoo, a five-minute warning via network broadcast message may precede the removal of the data.

board n. 1. A miniature version of a controller, sans dedicated CPU and thus sans microcode. 2. Any competitor's controller, even if it is technically a controller. (See also card.)

bobcat n. Egregious coding of

	strset(p,'0',strlen(p));
	strcat(p,q);

when a simple

	strcpy(p,q);

would suffice.

Bob's Pretty - prefix 1. Applied to an generic object or concept of average or inferior quality, for example: Bob's Pretty Good Alkaline Batteries; Bob's Pretty Fast Sort Routine; Bob's Pretty Quick Laxatives; Bob's Pretty Tough Household Cleaner; Bob's Pretty Good Security System; Bob's Pretty Safe Condoms. 2. Applied to a generic profession or service of average or inferior quality, for example: Bob's Pretty Good Roofers We fix most leaks; Bob's Pretty Sensible Translators We come pretty close; Bob's Pretty Good Software We can write anything in a week; Bob's Pretty Awake Trucking Service Sleep is just a caffeine substitute; Bob's Pretty Good Sports Injury Clinic Most of our patients walk out the same day; Bob's Pretty Fresh Seafood We double-freeze it for double freshness; Bob's Pretty Legal Law Firm We'll bend the rules to suit your needs; Bob's Pretty Intelligent Exterminators We'll get rid of your household pets; Bob's Pretty Safe Child Care We've never been sued.

booth babe n. Trade show term: an attractive male or female booth staff person with significant product knowledge, often a sales or marketing type, sometimes a hardware engineer. Antonym: booth bimbo.

booth bimbo n. Trade show term: an attractive male or female booth staff person who is clueless about the product, usually a fashion- or spokes-model selected to attract trade show attendees into the booth for free trade show foofoos. Antonym: booth babe.

bork n. 1. The word which, when asked what it means, the best answer is "bork." 2. When asked, the best answer to the question "When would you use this word?"

bottle n. Reserved area of shared memory for two-way synchronized transfer of data blocks; a communication channel between the host and the dedicated processor running microcode, primarily in the LX and TX product lines. Named for its similarity to the zippy rocket bottles at drive-up bank windows.

Bovine Research Center n. PC Land; the large bay fronted by 7188 Sturdy Oak Road. Name chosen both as a distraction to curious passers-by, since anything is better than Lots of expensive computer equipment, and in honor of the bovine beast. See CowScript and Moo. See also Pixel Hut.

brain n. A round loaf of bread, from ClayB's breadmaker of love, as in Another beautiful five-pound brain, or Thanks again for the brain, Clay, or Good fresh brain today! Does not connote fresh or stale. (See bread day.)

bread day n. A day in which someone brings in a fresh brain made earlier in the morning in their breadmaker of love. The Bread Users Group meets Thursday mornings around 9:30 a.m. Two days 'til bread day!

Brewsters n. Bar in Las Vegas visited several times during Fall '91 Demcox (previous name Tarkainian's, named after the coach of the Runnin' Rebels basketball team of UNLV). Entertainment included cheap beer, marginal food, Minnesota Twins vs. Atlanta Braves World Series, tie snipping.

BRIEF droppings n. pl. STATE.RST files left by the editor BRIEF when a STATE.RST directory is not specified in SETUP.

broken v. 1. Working but poorly or ignobly designed or implemented, for example dBASE, cc:Mail, and Dick's Operating System. Not specific to software. This dictionary is broken. 2. Not performing satisfactorily or complex enough for software engines, yet fine for the pond scum. What a broken feature. 3. Previously working, but currently unworking due to a new bug. I can't put it up in Prerel yet--it's still broken! 4. Any undesirable action, concept, mentality, or object. For example, a new tax law could be broken, or a genre of music -- say Country -- could be broken. 5. v. Not working at full brain capacity; in a state of crapulence. Aaron looks pretty broken this morning. Must've been a good party. 6. interj. Expression of pain when it hurts to think, as is typical after teardown or a release party. 7. interj. My glass/bottle is empty. 8. interj. Your glass/bottle is empty. 9. interj. You are blocking the path to the refrigerator. 10. interj. You are blocking the path to the bathroom. 11. interj. Any other nebulous undesirable state.

brownie n. Experienced when the LM 1200 plugged into your power strip causes your lights to flicker and dim until the electric company's emergency generators kick in.

brud n. An airborne loaf of bread (see clud, Hackey Bread).

bubble duffering spoonerism n. Double buffering, but only in reference to printing pages, not in reference to drinking as in double buffering.

BUG meeting n. Meeting of the Beer Users Group (or for tee-totalers the Beverage Users Group), usually after-hours on a Friday evening. interj. Bellowed to announce the arrival of the beer and suggest the gathering of the masses. interr. Request for monetary donation prior to a beer run.

Bugger King [bastardization] n. Burger King, a buttfood restaurant.

Building IX n. Name on the large sign in the grass in front of 7156 Sturdy Oak Road. At the time the building was named, there were 8 prior entreprenurial ventures started by LM'ers--all of which had failed. One of them was Hex Music, Inc., a company LeoS and LarryL started which developed but never sold a digital music synthesizer. So, naturally, the building was named Building IX.

bummage interj. 1. Flippant dismissal of something bad when sympathy is expected. 2. Similar to pretty sorry, but without concealed antipathy.

Bungholes [bastardization] n. General Mills Bugles corn snacks; a small, yellow, cone-shaped buttfood with a point at one end and a hole at the other end (presumably for your finger, as the back of the box shows). He's got a box of Nacho Cheese Bungholes with flavor sand! or Cool man, original salt bomb Bungholes!

butt- v. Of inferior quality. Flavoring prefix, used seriously, facetiously, sarcastically or sardonically. Almost always applied to food items. For example, see butt-burgers under sliders. Other examples: butt-breakfast, butt-chips, butt-chunks, butt-cream, butt-fries, butt-juice, butt-pack, butt-sauce. Sometimes appied to non-food items, such as butt-ware or butt-mobile. Derived from buttfood.

Butterfinger Group [Obsolete] n. One of four original PC software development teams which has long since disbanded; group of software engines gathered together to work on LX microcode; the first team to name itself, the name borrowed from an 1988 animated Butterfinger commercial featuring the young Bart Simpson; The other three groups followed quickly in suit, naming themselves respectively the Cow Group, the Jungle Group and the Sandwich Group.

butterfly n. Name of a three-card poker game; good game to play when broken as the maximum amount lost is 75cents per game. (See Dickhead.)

buttfood n. Any food or food-like substance whose nutritional content is the same whether you eat it or shove it up your butt. Origin: skate-board term. interj. Bellowed to announce the arrival of food obtained on a buttfood run.

buttfood content n. Measure of butt-ness in a food source. When sober, palatability is inversely proportional to the buttfood content. When broken, palatability is directly proportional to the buttfood content. "I need something with some serious buttfood content."

buttfoodens n. Small, bite-sized buttfood items, for example M&M's, cheese toes, or fry toes.

buttfood run n. A magnanimous one- or two-person trip to Douglie's, Bugger King, Hardee's, Wendy's, Scrubway, Grub Foods or any other place that sells buttfood, utilizing the drive-thru when possible. Like a beer run, only different. Most often during crunch mode.

buttfud n. Another name for buttfood. (See fud.)

butt-pack n. A cheap Douglie's or Bugger King kiddie box, comprising a butt-toy, a hamburger or cheeseburger, kippy fy fy, and a small Choke or Diet Choke.

butt-toy n. The most important item in a butt-pack; something to play with or chew on while puzzling over a bug.

Buttwiper [bastardization] n. Budweiser Beer. Named for its laxative effect when consumed in large amounts (see drop mud).

BYOB (B-Y-O-B) [acronym] v. Bring Your Own Blanket. Term used when announcing a party; implies that a party is going to be a damned good one. See blanket time and the Drink of Life and Death.


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Copyright 2009, Dave Polaschek. Last updated on Mon, 15 Feb 2010 14:06:28.